I was soon to be a new mom again... it was Mothers Day 1979... in the evening of what had been a fun packed day. I was in bed for the night, just beginning to pray.
"Oh my God!" I said, shocked and grieved by an awareness of my actions. "I am so sorry Father... I haven't talked with You yet today!!! That is not normal for me! Please forgive me, I really didn't mean to ignore You. I always begin and end my day with You and Jesus, and speak to You throughout it, how could this have happened? How could I have not included YOU in my day?" I could come up with no explanation.
Even so, I continued with immense love, joy and thankfulness in my heart, "It's been a exceptional day... thank You for this experience. I am so grateful for the gift of being a mom and a mom to be. I feel so loved and appreciated by our children. Thank You for our children, I love them so much, they are so very important to me. Thank You and thank You too Jesus for Who You are in my life as well. Father please....."
Suddenly I was
Whether I was in my body or out of my body, I did not know, it didn't seem to matter. I did know, this was happening to me.... and it was unexpected.
Instantly I was aware... I was one with Jesus... we were hanging on the cross... in time and eternity. Pure love poured out of Him. Love for His ... our heavenly Father... love for mankind... love for....
He was looking down. I was seeing through His eyes, feeling some of His intense emotions, receiving some of His understanding and revelation knowledge, even though words were never spoken. Although there were many gathered there, they no longer seemed to matter at that moment in time and eternity ... His focus was on His Mother... Mary.
She was looking up... searching for the eyes of her son. I sensed her torment fade.... as their eyes met in this moment I was given the privilege of experiencing. I seemed to be sensing everything flowing through Him.
I am sure Mary
was comforting and being comforted by those in grief and confusion around
her.... their pain mixed with her own ... for I knew such was nothing
compared to the affection and diverse emotions and understanding linking her
with Jesus... as she watched Him hanging there, marred beyond belief.
Tears on her face were marked by dirt from the dusty road she had walked upon,
as she had followed the road to
Although Jesus' flesh was tortured by pain... this pain was nothing compared to what they were experiencing within as their humanity touched. It seemed to ease somewhat as a Spiritual depth of understanding passed between them, an exchange words... mere words cannot describe.
Love for our heavenly Father and one another, HIS love for us... made their aching hearts easier to bear. Jesus understood all... was going to work out for the good and what was... must be. His inner strength flooded me as it seemed to pass on to her.
I with Jesus experienced their affection, their pain... their silent agreement as He communed with her. Their ... our hearts... minds united in time and eternity. Will I ever be able to describe the magnitude of emotion and revelation exchanged? ... I can say, it began with a mutual trust in the goodness of our heavenly Father and HIS eternal plan for HIS creation, HIS Spiritual Family, us ... it began through a united love in Who HE is and was to them ...and is now to us... through the Spiritual Life He ... HE offers ... HE imparts.
They shared this consciousness... of Father's eternal plan for HIS creation. A Spiritual connection and bond, neither suffering, sin nor death could break. A Spiritual connection His death and restored life was destined to offer others.... has offered me... all of us.
The endless love and gratitude in His heart... towards His Mother, for her willingness to surrender to Father's absolute will, Father's destiny for them both, for us all.... overwhelmed me. I realized His gift to each of us... of His bearing the consequences of sin and death through love... on a far, far deeper level within my Spirit, than I could have ever imagined or can attempt to express, even now.
As quickly as I had been taken, I returned ... instantly I found myself once again in my bed, my own face wet with tears... my eternal Soul ... Spirit changed forever.
I heard, "You have asked ME if Mary is to be worshipped as it is taught by some. Though she is not to be worshipped, she is indeed to be honored. All who choose to surrender to MY will ... will be honored by ME. Such are worthy of MY Name."